Do you remember your middle school years? Maybe your experience was fun and wonderful. Or maybe you were like me and you had trouble making new friends.
I was always told that I was so quiet and for years I thought something was wrong with me. Why wasn’t it easy for me to join into conversations and blend in? As my girls have started to grow up more, I’ve seen shyness in their personality at times. I even catch myself telling someone that they are just being shy, like I think that’s a proper excuse for them not feeling comfortable around strangers. The truth is that I don’t want them to be comfortable and I don’t want my girls to ever feel like it’s wrong to be reserved at the proper time.
I’ve struggled to be content with my personality. Sometimes, I just wish that I was a bubbly, joyful person that was talkative and fun to be around. But no matter how the world makes me feel, I can be confident in the way God made me, and that is what I hope to teach my girls.
Here are a few reasons why I’m thankful for growing up as the “quiet girl” :
*I stopped obsessing over cliques and popularity.
Of course I wanted to wear the name brand clothing and fit in the best that I could but deep down I never wanted to compromise my beliefs. Even at 11 or 12, I knew right from wrong and sometimes the people I hung out with talked about things that were wrong. I didn’t enjoy being around them but I also didn’t want to be alone. Eventually, I learned that I didn’t care if I was alone and I suddenly didn’t care about being popular. Instead, I prayed that God would send me a friend that also believed in Him and wanted to do what was right. He answered my prayer when I entered 9th grade and I’m so thankful for that friendship.
*Sometimes it’s better to listen then to speak.
Have you ever had a conversation with someone that doesn’t really listen to you when you are talking to them? But instead it’s like they are just always thinking about what they are going to say back. I sometimes struggle with this as well, but when I think about growing up and the personality that I have, I’m grateful for the times I just listened and observed. Also, I’m known for being a little sensitive at times and I think that I am that way in part because of the years of feeling alone in public school. It’s a blessing to realize how God can use that broken, depressed little 12 year old girl to shape me into the person I am now. You can learn so much from listening to others, so I want to challenge you to stop thinking about what you are going to say and listen to a friend that is sharing her heart with you. Stop and see what God is trying to show you through the conversation. Make your simple conversations meaningful.
*I’m an over-thinker, but I try to see the bigger picture.
I tend to overthink everything. Please tell me I’m not the only one. Sometimes when I overthink it’s small things like what I’m in the mood to eat but other times it’s really big things. For example, starting this blog took a lot of faith but I had a desire to see the bigger picture. I knew that even if only 10 people followed this blog I would feel accomplished because my motivations were never about numbers or popularity. I had and still have a an eagerness to connect with other moms that are passionate about raising their families to love and serve the Lord. Back in July of last year (when I started working on this site), it was easy to think about the blog failing and feeling like I wasn’t good enough, but I’m so thankful that I ignored those lies and prayed about it. My personality of always feeling like I’m not good enough reminds me that I need my Savior. I need Him for confidence and for joy because nothing of this world will ever fully satisfy me. Through prayer and faith, He knows the bigger picture and I must trust His plan!
The next time you see a shy child or maybe even a shy adult, don’t make them feel like being quiet is a always a negative trait. Try to see them the way God sees them, a person with a purpose and a plan. God uses our unique personalities in different ways and He makes no mistakes!
Were you shy growing up? I would love to hear your story and what God has taught in the comments below!
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